I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize