it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
