the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
