Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
