At least make sure they are 18
Why
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
