she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
