To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize