is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
