she pinky promised me she was 18
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize
