I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Randomize