Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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