morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
