Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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