so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
