Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize