Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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