its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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