Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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