can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
