oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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