trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
A bitchslap is in order.
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