so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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