Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
please don't ironically join a cult
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