I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Randomize
