I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
