just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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