is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize