me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize