I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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