Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
