It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
