If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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