Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
We need to get me chipped asap
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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