she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
