I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
