This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
