I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I just threw up on my dentist
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
