So gin and wine won't be happening again
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
