the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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