Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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