hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize