I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
