Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
