Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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