i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
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