is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
