i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Randomize
