Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
