Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
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