peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
high people should be assigned attendants
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
My vagina is very pro this idea
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He has the fingertips of a God
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
