Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
