i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
